Rising from the Ashes

As I look at my seven year old son, I wonder why was I chosen to be his mother? He's not biologically mine, but he's mine in my heart, and in my mind. I find myself wondering if I've been a good enough parent to him. Has he been hurt the way that I was? What goes on in his little mind? Does he wonder the way I did, what it would be like to live with his birth parents? Of course he does.
 I decided when he came into the care of my husband and I at under a year and a half, that he would know about his birth mother, who is my sister (foster sister), from day 1. I believe that truth is extreamly important in every relationship. You can't really have a real relationship, or a healthy one, without truth.
 Sometimes when I look at him I strongly dislike that he had to come into our care. Not because I don't love him, not because I would do it any other way if we could. Because his beautiful mother is missing out on his life. She's someone I would die for myself, we never would have decided to raise him if he was someone elses child. Maybe we would have. My husband and I were soo young, only 24, and just married 4 months. But I love her. And because I love her, I loved him. He's a very easy child to love. He's energetic, kind hearted, strong in what he believes, and a real people pleaser, on top of all that, he's got these big gorgeous hazel eyes, adorable little nose, and the perfect eye brows I've ever seen on any male, with a smile that'll melt your heart.
 He's the greatest big brother to our other son and daughter. They love him so much, and he them. They look up to him for his knowledge, his advice, and for so much more. When they're apart all they do is talk about each other and say how much they miss their siblings. He has filled our home with completion. They all have in their own little way.
 This Christmas I remember 6 years ago, our first Christmas with him. And I thank God for bringing him into our lives. My life was changed in many ways when I became him mommy. My promise to him, is that I will always put his emotional and mental needs ahead of my own. I will guide him the best I can with God's help, and I will always be honest with him.
 He's my Phoenix, and I will help him "Rise from the Ashes"